Although there is a song that refers to Christmas as “Its the most wonderful time of the year” Many would say – “No. No it’s really not” (Drake is working on this song currently.)
Christmas can feel forced and terrible
Do you ever think to yourself: is it wrong if I don’t want to sit on the lap of a 70 year old man with a beard in return for a present??? But the answer my friend is: NO. There is nothing wrong with you. No one should want this.
If, on Christmas, you want to sit alone in bed eating navy beans while trying to impersonate Denzel Washington while watching his movie Training Day – YOU SHOULD BE ALLOWED TO DO THAT.
Dogs know this very well.
If you want to get through Christmas like a dog, do the following:
1. Be real
If dogs don’t like someone – they show it. If you are at an event and you don’t like your Aunt Belissima who always asks you why you aren’t married – know that you are an adult now and it’s always ok to set boundaries by saying how you feel in a polite and assertive way.
For instance if Aunt Belissima says: “Kate – why aren’t you married yet?”
Kate can respond: “I don’t want to get married as running a strip club costs a lot of money, and I am saving up the money I would use for a wedding to set up a non-profit for dogs who have bad hair cuts and are frequently mistaken for Spanish racoons.”
2. If you are tired – nap
Dogs don’t wait to ask for permission to nap. Neither should you.
3. Steal shit
Dogs steal shit all the time. It’s pretty much written in their job description. If you see something you like, grab it. (As long as it’s food and the hosts tell you that you can have it.)
4. Give as much love as possible
Dogs love unconditionally. So maybe Aunt Belissima doesn’t appreciate your strip club – that’s ok. You can love her unconditionally without agreeing with her values, liking her, or spending much time with her. As the saying goes – be the change you want to see in your strip club.
How do you get through the Christmas season?
Leave us some tips below.